2009 Relaunch!

I launched this blog earlier in 2009 with good intentions a lot of excitement about the prospects of displaying the evidence of doing what I love to do.  But like so many things in all of our lives, it quickly had to be put on the backburner to other “more important” and responsible things in my life.  By the middle of January I hope to have my website and blog, revamped and re-going!

2009 was a big year for me.  Like any year there was triumph and failure, only this year the triumphs were much larger and more considerable than the failures.  I’d say one failure was this blog, but the intention and the steps I took towards starting a photography business was definitely a success.  I got engaged to the man I plan on spending the rest of my mortal life with, and I graduated with a bachelor’s degree from a prestigious University.  I grew to be more in tune with myself, and I have learned to accept who I am in many facets.

I learned a lot as well.  HUGE discovery of 2009 goes to learning of the havoc aspartame reaps on my body.  I gave up diet soda, which in many respects was like giving up my oxygen supply (for at least the first few weeks).  And in fact, I failed in giving up soda pop completely.  However I was VERY pleased to discover 8oz, 100-calorie cans of most all the great flavors, and even more pleased to learn that when you don’t drink diet soda regular soda becomes appealing and doesn’t taste all syrupy and sweet!

I learned that I can’t half-a** commitment.  When I want to do something or say I am going to do it, no matter what it is, I am unable to let myself jump into it only up to my knees.  I go head-first.  This is a problem in many respects, because I really like to do many things at once…but have finally learned I must limit myself.  My newest commitment is to myself.  In 2010, I have committed to putting myself first and everything else last, because while 2009 was a big year for me,  I have a feeling 2010, and 11 are going to prove to be something worth my while, and I want to enjoy them with confidence that the foundations that I build throughout these years I will be able to enjoy for years and years and years to come.  Beside that, I have to fit into a wedding dress in June that I want to feel confident, sexy, and radiant in.  And by all means, I am going to be able to do that, because I have committed to it.

I have also learned that I need to set goals for myself to keep life interesting,  because aside from aspiring to be a photographer I am a student and a worker.  That has been my identity for about seven years, namely, since I graduated high school.  Things tend to get a bit monotonous. And though, yes, I finally graduated from a certain aspect of my schooling, I still haven’t achieved the goal I have planned to reach for about 20 years now.  My mom has a picture that I drew in first or second grade in response to the prompt: when I grow up I want to be a .  The picture is a near two foot tall self portrait (including the freckles and wispy red hair) dawning a nursing cap, stethoscope, and red crosses.   Really that notion never changed, and I know it is for sure the profession I want to go into and that I am really good at.   But 2009 allowed me to learn, too, that it unfortunately is not my true passion.   It doesn’t allow me to exhibit my creativity and explore new facets of the world the way I have a desire to.  The great thing about the possibilities of where my life is leading me now is that I have come to the conclusion that I can have it all.  There is nothing in this world that says I can’t.  And my father reminded me of this in 2009, in a response to my facebook (oh yes another great thing about 2009 I will discuss in a minute) status that complained “Kaitlin Benoit: really wants to be a professional photographer!”  His response was “I’m pretty sure you accomplish whatever you set your mind to.”  So, I will, and I do, and I am.  The worse thing that can happen to me is that I fail, and really who hasn’t been there before?  The world moves on.

In the way of goals, I have also said that my 2010 resolution will be to cook a new healthy recipe ( I don’t want to limit myself to a type) once a week.  I am starting to think that I might be setting myself up for failure with the time line, so I am going to settle for two new recipes a month.  My goal is to push my small zone of safety in the kitchen and experience new foods and recipes that will enhance the enjoyment of living a healthy lifestyle.  I watched the movie Julie & Julia recently and I have to admit I was a bit inspired.  So don’t be surprised if you stumble across a few blogs here and there about my hit and miss recipes!

Another FANTASTIC discovery of 2009 was the power of FACEBOOK!  Aside from it being another great outlet to display and promote my work, it seemingly has brought my family so much closer!  Even if they don’t feel that way emotionally, in the empty space of time, it has collided our worlds in a way many of us have probably never dreamed of!  I have always said that I love the idea of communal family houses where the generations just keep piling in— however, I realize that that isn’t for everyone—so I would be okay with just having all my family members live on the same block.  In reality this will never happen (until I win the big time lotto and make it happen)…so facebook joined my life.  Low and behold my aunts, uncles, cousins, siblings, parents, and GRANDPARENTS have also been welcomed into my life through streaming updates and publicized pictures of the journeys I take.  This is not to mention how fun it is to stumble across long lost friends whom I’ve wondered about for the past near 18-20 years!

Really I think I could go on for quite a while about the wonders of 2009.  To wrap things up though, I will just list a few more:  I spent NYE 2009 with my family, I got my brother back, I experienced and saw the power of good karma,  I got to be Santa Claus, I helped people get through rough experiences in a positive way at least 70% of the days of this year, I came to terms with my path in life, my cat ate a wish bone, my other cat doesn’t throw up after eating anymore, Ortley Beach family reunion, my grandma came through a really rough surgery, my parents keep setting extraordinary examples of strength and resilience for me, my sister went to the state volleyball tournament, I fell in love with my fiancé again.   Just to name a few.

Here’s to bringing in the new year, and taking a quick look at the past, including a few of my favorite shots from various times in 2009!